so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
