All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Randomize
