That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
