i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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