He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
