He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
