I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
