I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize