dude i'm inner monologue high
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
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