hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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