The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
