I want to have your abortion
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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