they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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