I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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