would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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