i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Text me some of your sweat
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