we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
