Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
