god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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