For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
