so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
