He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
