my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize