Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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