I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
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