I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Randomize