Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm too high and old for this...
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
