How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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