walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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