I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize