I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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