she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
