Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Screwed.edu
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Randomize
