My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
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