i just wanna soil my oats bro
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
