i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
