Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
