is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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