yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
