So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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