Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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