yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Randomize
