I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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