fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
