those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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