Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
