I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
