Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
honey bunches of taint.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
