Whats the glycemic index on semen?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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