if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
You're breaking my sexual little heart
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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