Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
